jampy

Bits and pieces, today. Yesterday, I went with my sisters and my mother to see Whale Rider, it being Mothers' Day and all. The film rocked. I'm considering seeing it again, it was that good. It had me all crying in bits, and laughing, and grinning. All good. Claire and I bought mum the first seven DVDs of The Secret Life of Us, which happens to be my mother's not-so-secret favourite indulgence, and the DVDs also conveniently happened to be on very-special.

Last week was a bit of a shitter. I had several assessments, as well as working and cleaning my pigsty of a room, so it's not much of a surprise that I find myself needing a break. I've made a bit of a fool of myself recently by giving opinions in tutorials when I haven't done all the readings, so I'll have to see to that. Still, I did manage to link an Emerson article on originality and indebtedness to my own personal theory of fanfic, so I think I'm well on my way to a B.A. (Obsc. Hons.) There's a tutorial tomorrow I'm completely unprepared for, and for some reason I can't connect to the library to download the articles I need to read, so I might just have to go in early tomorrow. Or, I might just read the ancient sources that appear in my course reader, and worry about the modern historians on Thursday. Yes, a fine plan.

I had a performance assessment scheduled for today, at work. I was rather nervous about this, not only because I've been rostered for a month ahead of time with shifts I don't like, and the Monday one involves me leaving an English tute at 1pm (or 1:10 if the tutor rambles, as she did today) and getting to work at 2pm. It would not be at all seemly to be late to my performance assessment, so I ironed my shirt and everything this morning. I thought the appraisal might take the form of one of the assistant managers I don't like following me around for a shift, but it turned out to just be sitting in the office of the one who I do like, with him asking me how I think I do in various areas, and telling me how he thinks I do.

Now, I'm not comfortable promoting myself, and I think my tendency to be self-deprecating in job interviews has cost me a few appointments over the years. So this time I deliberately sold myself a bit, honestly telling how good I think I am at my job. The best part was that in most cases he scored me higher than I did myself anyway, and even when he didn't I was scored as performing to expectations, and the things I didn't do so well at were in the first week, when it was frantically busy and nobody really knew what they were doing anyway. Interestingly, I lost marks in the team-playing department because I'm happy to take on stuff to make other people's lives easier, but it simply doesn't occur to me to pass off tasks I'm too busy to do. I also realised that it's rather a good thing to be contracted for a month, since this means that they won't be getting rid of me anytime soon. That doesn't seem terribly likely, since I'm really good at my job, but it's nice to have reassurances.

I realised a few days ago, upon comparing my payslips and my bank balance, that I've saved well over half what I've earned from this job. I've found the amount of money I need to get comfortably through the week, and I get that out of the bank the day before payday, and live off cash in my wallet all week. I talked to someone today who earns well over what I do, yet had only $3 to last her till payday. I can't believe that. I can't imagine going out as often as she does not only because I'm antisocial (or introverted of a strange kind - I can have fun with people I know, but being around people I don't know is exhausting, and after prolonged social contact of any kind I need to hide away for a bit, or just with my Inner Circle) but also because I can't deal with spending that much money on food and entertainment. I've decided to buy Without You I'm Nothing because it's good for me, I've wanted this album for ages, and because I can. It helps that HMV is selling it for $15. I've found that music has been affecting me a lot more lately. I was supposed to have the deep connection with music when I was in high school, it seems to me. I missed out on it somehow, probably by not having a CD player of my very own. Now I have my stereo, which lives downstairs and is used communally, as well as my discman and the CD player on the computer. I find I just need to listen to certain music sometimes, and this does tie into the odd introversion thing. More details on this later, I think.

That would be a yes to the slash fiend question. Apart from that, I'm reading The Warrior Queens in a desultory fashion, as well as a lot of articles for uni. I came back to the Laudatio Turiae a few days ago, because it's such a lovely portrait of a powerful woman. And I really should start reading Mum and the Sothsegger since I'll have to present a paper on it next week. The new asthma treatment I began on Saturday seems to be working, the breathing thing is a lot easier and there's much less coughing. An unpleasant side effect is that it's given me a sore throat, which I could definitely do without.

I finally updated my poor, beleaguered fic. The previous chapter was uploaded late last year, so it's truly shameful that it's taken me this long to upload this little section. I've got more sections written lying around, but they require time for editing and decisions to be made about the directions in which I want the story to go. No doubt it'll take me ages to update any further.

I got my Ancient History tute paper back last week. I got 82, which is a high Distinction (almost, but not quite, a High Distinction). It's a bit of a worry that I'm doing so well in Ancient History, better than in English, which is supposedly my major. I'd consider changing my major, but I should really have been doing a different course this year if I was heading towards a major and honours in Ancient History, as well as studying at least a bit of Latin (because my four years of high school Latin just won't cut it for this stuff). I just don't think of myself as an Ancient History person, and this course has been my treat, so it's alarming to do so well in it. Mind you, I don't think of myself as a person who does well at uni, either. Fingers crossed that I'll do at least moderately well in my manuscript transcription assignment.

It was lovely to have nothing urgent to do today. I've done a fair bit of reading, but I'm between books at the moment. I may or may not be turning into a slash fiend. I went to the doctor, to make sure this beastly coughing isn't bronchitis or something else, and she's stepped up my asthma treatment. This is Very Good, as I've woken up over and over the last few nights unable to breathe. It doesn't help that cleaning my room stirred up a hell of a lot of dust. Serves me right for vacuuming, eh? I slept on the couch last night and woke up coughing, but not with the completely horrendous tight feeling there had been the night before.

A problem
I have a song stuck in my head. Unfortunately, I've only heard this song once, about eight years ago, on Triple J. Lengthy google searches have yielded naught, so now I'm turning it over to you, the mighty reader, to solve my conundrum.

This is what I remember of the lyrics.

Once you walked me to my car. der ner ner ner ner ner ner.
I couldn't remember where I parked. der ner ner ner ner ner ner.
Come on and tuck me in
With a little bowl of candy.
Come on and tuck me in
With a little bowl of candy.
Every sweet was wrapped in paper
And I thought you were my favourite flavour.

I can't tell you how glad I am that this week is over. Today, I submitted my English transcription assignment, sat a Phonology exam (in which I either got the problems right, or wrong in a clever way), sat idly by while creepy strangers inspected my house, and worked for five hours. These exhausting activities have been accompanied by endless paroxysmic coughing, which is probably the most tiring part. Last night I far exceeded the recommended dose on my asthma medication. I'm going to the doctor soon. Tonight, I'm going to stay on the computer for a while longer, and then go to bed. There shall be the mother of all sleep ins. I may make banana bread tomorrow.

I'm cleaning. Again. Today, I've taken out two huge garbage bags of garbage, and one of clothes. I'm on a break because I can't stop coughing because of the dust, and I must say I'm well and truly sick of cleaning. The inspection is tomorrow afternoon, so I can't stop now. I also have to write an essay today. Can't wait to have something to write about other than cleaning and essays. No doubt I'll find a new personal crisis to write about at tedious length.

Yesterday I started reading a witty and well-written fic by the name of Transfigurations. When I was about a quarter of the way through, I sent an e-mail to my sisters letting them know about it. Unfortunately, a few more pages in, it turned out to be slash. Oops.

My voice is nearly gone. It was croaky all day, but at work it slid towards rumbly nothingness. Five minutes before closing, I had to do the courteous get-out-we-want-to-go-home message over the loudspeaker, because nobody else was willing. 'I sound like a munchkin,' one of my colleagues whined. True, she sounds like a munchkin all the time, but at least the message would have been comprehensible. The customers I paused in serving to deliver the message said it sounded nice, but I think they were just humouring me, hoping I wouldn't breathe on them. They may have had a point. People are getting awfully shifty about SARS.

I've been spending a hell of a lot of time playing Flash Flash Revolution. I just did a perfect run of the Mario Level and because I'm a proud freak, I can prove it. Not to be sneezed at, I say. Let no one challenge me, however, as I think we all remember what happened last time I played Vib Ribbon. If anyone wants to buy me a present, I'd like some stamps and a very large cup of very sweet coffee.

Keine Hosen Heute
Heather: I think it's just a no-pants day. The pants are being repelled by your essential no-pants energy.
Claire: I didn't hear all that, but it sounded funny.
*
Claire: I'm a sick munchkin. Or a sick panda. The kind that doesn't have to wear pants.
Heather: Like Humphrey?
Claire: Yeah! (starts humming Here's Humphrey theme)

Turns out Abby is a deviant. And another kind of deviant, too. The latter wrongness is, alas, warping my fragile little mind. I can feel its slimy tentacles worming their way through my understanding of all that is right and acceptable.

I made vegetarian sausage equivalents and corn fritters with tomato salsa for dinner. It was tasty. It should be noted that, however sick you may be of cooking, throwing the rest of the batter into the pan to make one giant corn fritter is a bad idea. It will stick in parts, and refuse to turn as one, so you'll end up with scrambled corn fritter instead. Tasty corn mess, but mess nonetheless. And now I'm realising that all the stuff I elected to keep off my bedroom floor is piled over my bed, and I should get to bed soon. Also, I'm realising that, although I threw out two giant bags full of stuff, it's barely made a dent. The stuff I decided to keep won't fit back in the spaces where it lived with two bags of garbage. Clearly, more cleaning is required. Equally clear is the fact that this will not be happening tonight. Nor, it seems, will most of my English assignment be happening tomorrow, as there are impending demands for my cleaning services.

In other news, I really, really, want to see X2. The problem with seeing films for free is that it's very difficult to justify paying to see any film. It's also difficult to find money for entertainment in your budget even when you really want to see the film. So with really big movies, like X2, the cinema won't give out free tickets at first because the sessions are full, which seems fair, so I have to wait to see it. But I am full of anticipation. I will soon go bang. We saw Anita and Me today, which rocked, but I really want to see X2. Interestingly, I seem to be in something of a comic book geek movie frenzy at the moment. I liked Spiderman and Daredevil, I saw X-Men the other day and loved it more than the first time. I downloaded the trailer for League of Extraordinary Gentlemen tonight, and it gave me goosebumps.

I had a maudlin day today. I don't know quite why. Things weren't as good with Andrew as I'd like them to have been, largely because I was feeling maudlin and therefore kept bringing up all the longterm unresolved issues between us. There's only one, so I had to bring it up a few times and extrapolate other problems from that one issue, to fill time. Ah, the things I do to a nice Saturday afternoon.

I got home to a letter from the Real Estate Agents (who suck) informing us that they'd like to inspect our property this week. Now, we've been here for three years, and they've never inspected the place before. We've lived rather happily in a world relatively protected from the agents. We can only extrapolate, then, that they want to inspect the property because the landlord wants to sell it, or they've somehow got word of our slovenly ways. Slovenly is perhaps too strong a term, we try really hard to keep the communal areas clean, but our bedrooms tend to be messy. Very messy. Thank heavens we did the Good Friday Communal Areas Blitzkrieg, and I've been cleaning my room up (a little!) because I'm sick of living in a pigsty. I bought a dressing table mirror for $5 at my opshop last Saturday, because I'm sick of having my girly things sprinkled around the room. The mirror will go nicely on top of my low bookshelf. Also, there's a comfy armchair downstairs that's been there for a couple of years, just waiting for me to move my arse and clear a space for it. I've cleaned out two garbage bags full of stuff already, as well as gathering up a box of books to give to charity. I rock. Unfortunately, because of all the dust my face is all itchy, and I have to sleep in that room in a few hours. Tomorrow I'm working in the morning. I'll pick up a few wine boxes to store all my mathoms in - there's a seemingly endless space in the top of the wardrobe, it's gone completely unused these many years. This shall end. I need to clean more tomorrow afternoon, as well as typing up my Winchester Malory transcription and starting my report on the transcription. I need to read an article and a few sources for my ancient history tutorial on tuesday, as I'm working on Monday. On Friday, I have an Phonology test so I need to do some reading and practice for that. I feel calm about all this work to do. This puzzles me. I wish I could go and help all the procrastinators I know to go about things in a calm and sensical manner. For I have seen the light and yea, it is good.

Blog - Now a poem!

jampy Unless otherwise
indicated, all the Royal Dress Show, We headed over
there never
been known to affect me to uni
tomorrow before my
illness? appear sexually explicit
in question
involves attempting a comfy couch in my velvet
jacket and made a
delicious creature himself, when
he is a friend, as I love
what I found that we collapsed
onto the idea received some tumbled
stones. The outside,
but sometimes music but I find the bags while
drunk is fiercely
air early in question involves
attempting a purple together
We want to
the Easter Show. I made me
to the service, and while Mum and I was
great. It was
really be ensconced in
my rapidly numbing dukes under running
cold water. rapidly spreading to be noted that came in my ,
wrist.

Friday Five
Name one song you hate to admit you like.
David Cassidy singing I Think I Love You. I really shouldn't like that. It's bubblegum. I love it.

Name two songs that always make you cry.
I'm not much of a crying person, but Unchained Melody and Gary Jules' Mad World take me pretty close.

Name three songs that turn you on.
Kirsty Maccoll singing In These Shoes and Peggy Lee with Fever are some pretty damn sure bets. Perhaps as immortalised by the lovely Doris Day is right up there too.

Name four songs that always make you feel good.
Praise You - Fatboy Slim, Every Day - Buddy Holly, Woh Ladki Hai Kahan - Dil Chahta Hai, Do Your Thing - Basement Jaxx.

Name five songs you couldn't ever do without.
Coffee And TV - Blur, Magic Carpet Ride - Steppenwolf, No One Knows My Plan - They Might Be Giants, I Have Confidence - The Sound Of Music, Lust For Life - Iggy Pop.

I woke up this morning with the kind of sore throat that puts the gag reflex on a hair trigger. I really need to go in to uni to return a library book - it's already three days overdue. I'll be charged another dollar if I don't get it in today, but the travel costs come to more than $1 and I have to go to uni tomorrow anyway. It's settled. I'll spend today at home being sick and doing my Linguistics work, and take the book back tomorrow before my lecture.